A colostomy is a surgical procedure that involves creating an opening (stoma) in the abdominal wall through which feces can pass into an attached collection bag, also known as a colostomy bag. This procedure is typically performed on individuals who have had a portion of their colon removed due to cancer, inflammatory bowel disease, or other medical conditions. While a colostomy can be life-saving, it can also affect a person’s sexual intimacy and self-image. However, with proper care and communication, people with a colostomy can enjoy fulfilling sexual relationships.
Communicate with Your Partner
Effective communication is key to maintaining intimacy and overcoming any challenges related to a colostomy. If you have a colostomy, talk to your partner about your concerns, questions, and preferences before engaging in sexual activity. Discuss any potential physical limitations or discomforts you may experience during sex. Communicate your feelings and concerns about your body image, including any concerns about the colostomy bag. It is essential to establish trust, understanding, and mutual respect in the relationship.
Plan Ahead
Before engaging in sexual activity, it is essential to be prepared. Empty and clean your colostomy bag to reduce the risk of odor or leakage. Consider wearing special clothing or lingerie that will accommodate your colostomy bag or provide additional support. Place a towel or sheet under your body to protect your bed or furniture from any leaks.
Explore Different Positions
Certain sexual positions may be more comfortable or practical when having sex with a colostomy bag. Experiment with different positions, such as side-by-side or spooning, that allow you to maintain control over the colostomy bag and reduce pressure on the stoma. Pillows or cushions can also provide support and reduce discomfort.
Use Lubrication
Using a water-based lubricant can help reduce friction and discomfort during sexual activity, particularly if you experience vaginal dryness. It is essential to choose a lubricant that is compatible with your colostomy bag and won’t cause damage to the material.
Focus on Sensuality
Sexual intimacy is not just about penetration. Sensual activities such as kissing, cuddling, and massage can enhance intimacy and pleasure, without placing pressure on the colostomy bag. Focusing on touch, scent, and other sensory experiences can help you and your partner connect in a deeper way.
Seek Support
Living with a colostomy can be challenging, and it is essential to seek support from healthcare providers, support groups, or mental health professionals if needed. These resources can provide guidance on self-care, body image, and sexual intimacy after a colostomy.
Conclusion
Having a colostomy does not have to limit your ability to have fulfilling sexual relationships. Effective communication, planning, and experimentation can help you and your partner overcome any challenges related to the colostomy bag and enjoy intimacy and pleasure. Remember, with proper care and communication, you can still have a healthy and enjoyable sex life.
References:
American Cancer Society. (2022). Colostomy Guide. Retrieved from https://www.cancer.org/treatment/treatments-and-side-effects/physical-side-effects/ostomies/colostomy.html
Bartlett, L. (2013). Ostomies and sexual relationships. British Journal of Nursing, 22(9), 508-513.
Colwell, J., & Doherty, W. (2016). An exploration of sexual function and body image self-consciousness among individuals with colostomy or ileostomy. Journal of Wound Ostomy & Continence Nursing, 43(1), 71-75.
McGaughey, J. (2017). Sexuality and the person with a stoma. Gastrointestinal Nursing, 15(8), 36-42.
National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases. (2019). Colostomy. Retrieved from https://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/digestive-diseases/colostomy